- Most consistent idea: Give him a choice. Whether it's between grapes or a banana, give him a choice so that it's him who chooses he wants to eat a banana. So if you want him to take a bath, give him a choice between the toy he wants to play with. If you want him to put on clothes, let him chose between a green shirt or a red shirt.
- Give him the appearance of a choice: Do you want to get out of the car now, or play for two minutes and then get out of the car? No matter what he'll be getting out of the car but it's making him feel like he has control about his life.
- As long as he has a balanced diet over a week or a month's time, he's going to be fine. Work on getting him 5 fruits and vegetables each day, but if it doesn't happen--that's just fine.
- Some days he'll eat lots and some days he won't eat anything. That's just fine.
- When he wants to say "no" to everything, find ways to distract him from saying no. Here's an example: My 2 1/2-year-old won't always cooperate — no surprise! For instance, I'll ask him to sit down to eat and he'll say "No!" and laugh, and start dancing around instead. That used to make me mad (okay, it still does), but I try to laugh back and say something like, "What's going on there, Legs? You tell Bottom to sit right in that chair!" That makes him laugh and breaks his defiant mood. — Jan, Minnesota
- Take advantage of the "me do it" attitude. He wants to do everything himself because he wants to be independent, so make a big deal about him doing it himself.
I dunno...a lot of people have different ways of raising children, but these seem to be consistent with the way I'm raising Porter. Hope it's helpful for you!